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GROW LAWNS NOT FOOD!

Remember my last post? The one from 10,000 months ago the last time I had time to write? Short summary--it was all about how I was never, ever going to do bento because it just gets pooped out anyway so what's the point. Well...per my usual pattern of railing against something and then diving in headlong until it becomes a new special interest, I'm now proud to present:



OMG YES that is MY homemade bento on MY kitchen counter!!! (And yes, it is 1000% ORGANIC and blessed by the patron saint of goji berries. And a 5th degree sensei. Or something. And yes, one of the onigiri has 3 eyes because I made it that's why).

What's a victorious mom to do? First I go about congratulating myself, then I send pics to my BMFs (best mom friends)...and THEN I learn that HOLY CRAP I'm STILL not doing enough for the health and nutrition of my family because every mom worth her (imported Himalayan) salt has a yard that looks like this:



BTW, if you're the owner of the above foodlawn I mean absolutely no disrepect--and would be happy to credit the swiped image. But srsly, learning about the whole "Food Not Lawns" movement made me:

1) run for my bottle of eco-cert anti-anxiety herbs and

2) wonder HTF am I going to ever have time to do THIS while making bento every day and getting real in the Whole Foods parking lot every weekend. Oh, and the 10,000 other things I have to do on a regular basis so that the sky doesn't fall and the house doesn't collapse and I make it to my part-time job when scheduled and the kid doesn't (*perish the thought*) wind up accidentally swallowing a mouthful of GMO macaroni. Not like I have an inflated sense of my self-importance or anything. But I hope that at least now you understand why I keep that bottle of eco-cert herbal anti-anxiety medicine at the ready, right?

So--in revenge against this movement solidarity with all the other parents of toddlers out there whose lawns don't look like food, I propose the following pushback: LAWNS NOT FOOD! C'mon--someone with awesome graphic design skills make me a super cool motto and send it to my inbox. Yoo-hoo, I'll make you viral.

Why a LAWNS NOT FOOD movement, you ask? Because look at the above picture of the beautiful foodlawn (that, yes, I am growing increasingly envious of as I write--haha, get it? Growing? MOM JOKE!). But seriously--could it do this?:



Ooo nohoho, I tell you. And just imagine how awesome THIS is after the kiddo has played on it for 3 hours straight with mom smiling on lovingly while sitting beneath a patio umbrella and sipping mint juleps. Oh and--wait for it, wait for it...then when said kiddo comes inside and wants to--you guessed it--NAP for another 3 HOURS STRAIGHT! Lemme tell ya, that is the mom JACKPOT. Can a pile of heirloom rutabaga do that? I don't think so.

Or, now that we're on the subject, this?:



Wait--WTH are you looking at, you may ask?? Well, I'll tell you. It's my dog, a high-energy mutt who is NOT inside licking holes in the couch. Yes, he does that when feeling pent up. (Note to self: google eco-cert herbal pills and see if they're safe for dogs). Here you see him doing what he does best. Run and runandrunandrun. Which, btw is why I only have like, 3 pictures that are not blurry captures of his butt and happy tail in the air. And I think all 3 of them were taken after sedation when we had him neutered 10 years ago.

Oh, and if you're wondering OF COURSE I'm still sitting here sipping my mint julep while watching his happy butt. I think I'll pour myself another and stay outside all day. Because drinking in the shade while two of my kids (human and canine) gleefully wear themselves out, that's why. Oh, and this:



*Disclaimer: Knowing my typical M.O. organic-heirloom-eco-cert-nitrogen-fixing-survival gardening might just eventually become a special interest of mine. I do already grow my own mint. But mint, of course, is sooo easy (she says while reaching over for a sprig to freshen up her drink).

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